The meeting exchange was fascinating.
Belle resisting giving Max the absolute answer he so clearly wanted; Max’s rising frustration with what he perceived as Belle’s wishy-washiness; and Belle’s explanation of how ambiguity is sometimes the right leadership answer.
Some business problems do have a black-and-white answer, like Is Sally ready to be promoted now? Yet with experience comes the realization that there isn’t a clearcut answer to many of the issues leaders face.
Selecting only one remedy is selecting wrong! Why? Because both answers are right.
Sometimes our business needs speed and efficiency; other times achieving effectiveness takes a little longer. Leaders have to balance creating change while also maintaining stability.
We have to figure out how to prioritize both work and life demands.
On the receiving end of ambiguity
When you’re hoping for a black-and-white answer and get a shade-of-gray response, it’s likely you’re facing one of those both/and leadership scenarios. If so:
Reframe your impatience and/or disdain into inquiry.
Look for the bigger picture. Ask clarifying questions to understand why you received that response. Own digging in to understand the reasons behind the both/and answer.
Be willing to explore alternatives and contingencies.
Possibilities that may have never occurred to you can be top of mind for someone else — and could be a critical, overlooked factor which impacts your decision-making.
Challenge yourself.
Why is it that you always want a black-and-white answer. Are you seeking a quick fix? Are you reluctant to take a deeper look; and if so, why? Are you succumbing to quantity over quality? Are you putting the bottom line above principles and people?
On the giving end of ambiguity
If you’re giving a both/and response to someone who obviously isn’t satisfied:
Explain your ambiguous answer.
We all process information in our own way, so providing an explanation of how you reached your conclusions helps others understand your thought processes. Here’s your leadership opportunity to teach others how either/or isn’t always the appropriate solution.
Start a dialogue.
Step back from command-and-control and seize the opportunity to expand each other’s point of view.
Be compassionate.
The person who wants the definite answer isn’t wrong, so don’t treat them as if they are. This isn’t the time for belittling remarks; it is the time for a teachable moment.
What both/and learnings do you have to share?
Image source: morgueFile
It’s sexist to say that chsricteraatics like assertiveness, confidence, boldness and aggression are quintessentially male.The reason successful women display these qualities in a business setting is because these attributes are demanded of anyone, male or female, who wishes to succeed. There are plenty of effete, passive men who can’t hack the cutthroat nature of the business world. And as for the trousers, there are men in business who would look at a woman’s breasts and legs before they listen to her speak (no surprise there!). The trousers preclude this from happening, and display the requisite seriousness.