by Jane Perdue | Power
“Cheryl, you know more about these work processes than most of the folks up there. Did you apply to be a speaker?” I asked, wondering why my colleague was sitting next to me in the audience rather than participating in the panel discussion at the national conference we were attending.
“I thought about it but decided not to.”
“Why’s that?”
“Once I get promoted, my chances of being a speaker will be better.”
Six months later, Cheryl called to tell me she’d been laid off during a company reorganization. The reason? She wasn’t a “cultural fit” anymore. Her replacement? One of the individuals who participated in that panel discussion.
Cheryl’s limited understanding of power coupled with her reluctance to embrace what she thought she knew about it contributed to her undoing, and she’s not alone. Given the negative associations surrounding the topic, who can blame them? However, we can’t hide behind power’s lack of appeal and abdicate using it. Doing so robs us of our ability to effect constructive change.
When we think of power, we most commonly think of position power — the authority and influence associated with holding a particular job or position within an organization or some other social hierarchy. This is the form of power Cheryl was referencing when she felt she needed a promotion before she was qualified to be a speaker.
But what Cheryl overlooked was another form of power — personal power. Personal power is rooted in ourselves — what we know, how we feel about ourselves, and how we conduct ourselves when interacting with others. It’s driven by our self-esteem (“I am worthy”) and self-efficacy (“I can make a positive difference”).
3 ways to embrace your personal power
There’s a smorgasbord of personal power available to us from which we can pick and choose in any particular set of circumstances based on our needs, wants and confidence level.
Make room for compassion.
In his book “The Ways and Power of Love,” Pitirim Sorokin, a former leader of the Harvard Research Center in Creative Altruism, details the positive force of altruism. Today’s research abounds with studies showing the lack of employee engagement in most workplace. By being strong and powerful enough to practice empathy and kindness, imagine the increases possible in employee engagement, connection and loyalty.
Dare to be the “angel’s (versus devil’s) advocate” contrarian.
When the boss is headed down a path of questionable morals, it requires character and guts to disagree. Sometimes, we have to step into our personal muscle and exercise the capacity to stop things from happening.
Embrace vulnerability.
Sometimes we have to be strong and powerful enough to admit our weaknesses because the perfect circumstances will never happen. “When we spend our lives waiting until we’re perfect or bulletproof before we walk into the arena, we ultimately sacrifice relationships and opportunities that may not be recoverable, we squander our precious time, and we turn our backs on our gifts, those unique contributions that only we can make,” writes Brene Brown, author of “Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead.”
Power is a lot like love or happiness; there isn’t a single perfect source for it. We must be both willing and open to seek it in multiple of sources and be smart and confident enough to mix up the sources we use to produce the right outcome for the right time.
This post first appeared at Smartblog | Image credit before quote: Gratisography
by Jane Perdue | Power
While discussing the push/pull polarities of influence styles at a workshop on Power, Persuasion and Influence that I was facilitating for a group of Fortune 100 executive women, one woman shared a moving observation with the group: while knowing which style of influence is best to use depending upon the situation is important, the real issue is one’s willingness to take the risk to influence, especially if the status quo is in question.
Her courageous workshop action item was to take that risk.
She said she owed doing so to her colleagues, the organization and herself.
What a powerful moment.
The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing, is nothing, and becomes nothing. He may avoid suffering and sorrow, but he simply cannot learn and feel and change and grow and love and live. ~Leo F. Buscaglia
Sometimes the risk is being the square peg in the round hole, say, wearing kelly green when your colleagues are wearing charcoal grey, or daring—albeit politely—to be the corporate contrarian, or dancing with the elephant in the room.
Risking your secure place in the corporate food chain by questioning new practices that run contrary to stated values is a high stake gamble. Will you be rewarded, take a small hit, or lose it all?
According to Julie J. McGowan, professor at Indiana University, “Risk taking is hard to adopt among leaders, because recognized leaders have the most to lose and aspiring leaders may be discounted as lacking in knowledge or common sense.” Risk-taking can yield great rewards and possibilities for learning provided you’ve done your homework ahead of time.
Assess your risk taking abilities
You must have high EQ, PQ (political quotient) and a thorough knowledge of your work culture to assess your tolerance for workplace risk-taking.
Consider:
1) Historically, how has your corporate culture reacted to those who challenged the status quo? Are you prepared to accept possible negative outcomes? Are you willing to see your credibility erode? Are you equipped to lose your job?
2) Is this an issue that’s important to you alone, or do others share similar concerns? Will others who think/feel/believe the same speak up after you’ve led the charge, or will your voice be the only one that’s speaking? Are you ready to forge ahead regardless?
3) Are you able to be the center of attention if your topic goes viral within the company? Are you primed to be a role model and/or attacked?
4) Do you have solid solutions already in mind? Are you disposed to collaborate with others and devise a solution that integrates the views of many?
5) Have you brainstormed possible unintended consequences, both positive and negative, of the stand you’re championing?
6) Are you OK, mentally and emotionally, with the possibility of failure? Will your self-esteem survive the hit? Can your ego resist the adulation of success?
7) Do you have the will to see it through? Do you have a support system that will nurture you throughout, regardless of the outcome?
Risk tolerance is extremely personal.
Only you can decide if high risk/high reward is your métier or if low risk/low reward represents the boundaries of your comfort zone.
Either way, be prepared, be thoughtful, and do what’s right for you.
Image source before morgueFile.com
by Jane Perdue | Power
Like love, power is one of those words that is rarely spoken in the workplace.
And, when it is, those conversations usually happen in whispered tones and follow a flagrant example of power gone wrong like when:
– A CEO believes he or she is above the law, an attitude that leadership ethicist Terry Price defines as “something that’s wrong for others but OK for me.”
– A newly promoted manager is intoxicated with their authority and bosses everyone about.
– A quiet someone who has a dissenting view refrains from speaking up because they believe they lack sufficient influence to affect outcomes.
Power gets a bad rap. It’s misunderstood or used improperly. Some say it corrupts. Others believe it to be evil and self-serving. Truth is, in and of itself, power is none of these things. It’s simply the neutral capacity to deploy resources to generate change and achieve results. It’s only in how one chooses to use, or not use, power that it becomes good or bad.
Looking back, no one ever taught me about power: what it was or how to use it effectively. No college class curriculum or leadership workshop addressed it. Bosses didn’t bring it up in performance reviews or staff meetings. As with many things that exist in the shadows, incorrect assumptions loom large.
3 incorrect notions about power
1) Because I am the boss, I am all powerful.
It’s not quite true that absolute power corrupts absolutely. That only happens if you let it happen. Research shows that people who believe they have power become less compassionate, less connected, and see others as a means to an end. They view themselves as above the law and adopt an all wise mentality.
Rather than embrace such a kingly position, it’s best to remember that all work gets done by and through people, so staying connected and open to the input of others should remain high on a leader’s priority list. Resist the siren song of believing you’re above the law and better than others simply because you have a high responsibility, high authority position. Stay self-aware.
2) Because I’m not a boss, I don’t have any power.
Au contraire! Just as one can be a leader even if one isn’t the leader, the same holds true for power. Power is readily available from a multitude of sources provided you have the courage and foresight to take it and use it.
You don’t have to sit in the corner office job or even supervise others to have power. Power can flow from your expertise, connections, access to information and strong interpersonal communication skills. Personal power is a state of mind in which you confidently believe in your own strength and competence.
Character-based leaders walk the talk as defined by Rosabeth Moss Kanter when she writes “powerful leaders rely more on personal power than job title, or credentials, to mobilize their resources, inspire creativity, and instill confidence among subordinates.”
3) I don’t want power because it will corrupt me.
Power will corrupt you only if you let it. Formal and informal leaders influence others. Influence goes hand-in-hand with power (whether one wants to admit it or not). Shying away from any position or personal power leaves you powerless, without the ability to shape outcomes or make a positive difference.
“Power is required if one wants to get anything done in any large organization,” says Stanford University professor Jeffery Pfeffer. “Unfortunately, power doesn’t just fall into one’s lap: one will have to go after it and learn how to use it.” Positive use of personal power helps a business effectively realize its mission and goals.
What other notions about power have you seen where you work?
Image source before quote: morgueFile.com
by Jane Perdue | Power
Jeez, I didn’t get the memo.
Did you?
The one about letting us know compromise isn’t acceptable anymore.
Somewhere along the way, compromise (defined by Merriam-Webster as a settlement of differences by consent reached through mutual concessions) got confused with capitulation or collusion. It’s portrayed as selling-out or being a weakling.
My parents and experience have taught me that compromise is a natural part of life, love, and leadership.
Mom and Dad did a great job in teaching me what’s illegal, immoral and unethical. Not compromising one’s values and beliefs around legality and ethics makes perfect sense, yet many of the situations we face every day don’t reach that status. (more…)
by Jane Perdue | Power
Ever feel envious of that successful work colleague who’s connected to everyone, whose projects and budgets get approved, and whose opinions are actively sought out because people want to know what they think?
If you do, please don’t waste your time being jealous. Rather, focus on improving your abilities in the art and science of influence. (more…)
by Jane Perdue | Power
Ah, work/life/business boundaries—so tricky, so necessary, and so darn hard to manage for many reasons both personal and professional.
A female business colleague and I were sharing insights for how we set (or don’t) boundaries for work and personal time.
(Before I go on, I must raise my hand and confess, “I, Jane, am a workaholic” because this tendency plays a role in how my story unfolds.)
Over the last six weeks, I attended twelve teeball games, two a week, all with 5:30 PM start times (My corporate hard wiring kept asking, isn’t 5:30 PM the middle of the afternoon?!).
There I saw my six-year-old grandson smile shyly yet proudly at us on the sidelines after his triumphant runs to first base. I could cheer him (and others) on in what one charming little fellow so creatively named “first we hit, then we glove.”
To my second act of life way of thinking, this encouragement and our presence were acts of leadership development for those small girls and boys. We were helping them build self-confidence, learn teamwork, and get better at sharing.
Because the coach rotated the kids from one fielding position to another, they were learning to appreciate that each one of them brings different skills and outlooks, a great exercise in building tolerance.
Going to those teeball games was a commitment of time for me, I’m sad to say, that wouldn’t have happened in the first act of my life.
In the corporate America first act of my life, there was the ever-present, yet albeit covert, belief that individuals—especially women—who left work early for family reasons (things like 5:30 PM teeball games) “weren’t giving it their all” or were “unwilling to do what it takes.”
Given my desire to succeed, I drank the corporate koolaid by the gallon. Not wanting anyone to say I wasn’t willing to do what it took, 70 or even 80 hour work weeks were my norm.
I used to joke that a 40-hour week was a part-time job.
Ah, what a sick puppy I was.
Time for a new direction for business
Having emerged from my “corporate detox” period, I’m more objective. Now I see the error of my earlier ways.
Back then, I didn’t set any boundaries. I was an all-work-no-play gal. I allowed my work schedule and life to be influenced by covert stereotypes.
But now, from the perspective of time and distance, I can see how badly frayed the fabric of business practices is. Spoken and unspoken expectations that enabled, no – encouraged, my nose-to-the-grindstone, crank-it-out work ethic.
Organizational cultures where taking time away from the office to participate in activities like cheering on the next generation of leaders wasn’t valued. Where doing so is, in fact, negatively rewarded at review time for those bold and smart enough to set boundaries. I’m now taking ownership to change this.
Along with Anne Perschel, I researched women in business and their relationship with power. You can read our findings in our report.
Now I’m ready to start reweaving the fabric of business so those teeball acts of leadership development and other changes can happen. For women. For men. For anyone interested willing to learn the lessons of paradox and power.
Ready to suit up and play?
Image source before quote: morgueFile.com
