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Let’s fix the problem with power

Let’s fix the problem with power


Power has a reputation problem.

When I use the word power, I’m referring to changing “what is” to “what can be.”

When I ask people to talk about power, they wrinkle their nose in disgust or say, “I’d rather not.” When I ask them why not, they offer up reasons why power is bad, saying things like:

  • Power makes people selfish and insensitive.
  • Power makes you over-confident, narcissistic, and corrupt.
  • Having people makes you intimidating.

People aren’t wrong when they say these things about power. Who hasn’t worked for bosses who were all these bad things—and more? If personal experience isn’t enough, research affirms that some people who have power are selfish, corrupt, and cruel.

As a result of these unsavory encounters, power becomes the bad guy to be avoided, like the creepy stranger who lures kids into cars with candy.

The problem with this avoidance solution?

It leaves the bad guys in charge.

In reality, power, in and of itself, isn’t inherently good or evil. Power takes on either the goodness or badness of the person using it.

Power undirected by high purpose spells calamity; and high purpose by itself is utterly useless if the power to put it into effect is lacking. ~Theodore Roosevelt

Because so many people abuse power, we confuse power with the bad person misusing it and say we don’t want power.

When thoughts like this get into our heads, they can be hard to get rid of. However, for the greater good, now’s the time to let go of the notion that power is a bad thing and reclaim it as something good.

The problem? The bad person misusing their power


The problem with seeing power as an evil force to be avoided? This view removes the person who has the power from the equation. They become an innocent bystander to a situation of their own making. That’s not right.

Linguist Julia Penelope says the nouns we use and where we place them in a sentence changes how we interpret a topic. She says we sometimes go so far as even to forget that a person is responsible for what happened to us.

Julia uses the following series of sentences to illustrate this omission:

John beat Mary.

Mary was beaten by John.

Mary was beaten.

Mary was battered.

Mary is a battered woman.

By the time we get to the third sentence, John has disappeared, and the topic has shifted from John beating Mary to Mary’s identity as a battered woman. When these thinking shifts occur, whomever or whatever initiated the event is deleted. OMG.

We’re doing the same thing when we say power is bad. Power itself isn’t bad, it’s the greedy or egotistical person who’s changing “what is” to “what can be” to suit their own purposes who is.

What power does is that it liberates the true self to emerge. ~Joe Magee, power researcher and professor of management at New York University

Professor of psychology and sociology G. William Domhoff notes that power is one of a few universal dimensions that humans encounter at the interpersonal, group, and societal levels.

Why is power’s universality important to recognize? Because doing good involves having and using power—but for the greater good, not personal gain.

It doesn’t matter if the doing good happens at work, at home, in the community, or in pursuit of social justice or equality. Changing “what is” to “what can be” requires power. If you’re like me and want society and workplaces to be more equitable, inclusive, and kind, we need power to effect those changes.

Eligibility checklist for power?


I confess. My tolerance for selfish, money-oriented, glory-grabbing people in positions of power has been exhausted. Because of that, I’ve been thinking about what can be done to ensure that the people who have power are the ones who can properly handle it.

Most powerful is he who has himself in his own power. -Seneca

Here’s what is on my list so far:

1) Change what’s measured and rewarded. Require that leaders at all levels be held accountable for people, principles, and profits. Measuring success only by dollars and cents perpetuates bad behaviors while encouraging more of them.

2) Call’em out. Rather than lauding their actions, criticize CEOs and Wall Street analysts who focus on only the bottom line. Who says capitalism must be heartless?

3) Take a leadership oath of office. Doctors do it. So do new citizens, politicians, soldiers enlisting for the U.S. Army, nurses, lawyers, and pharmacists. Part of the oath would be a promise to hold people, principles, and profits equally important.

What would you add to the power-eligibility list?


Image credit before quote: Pixabay



Unlearning a lifetime of habits

Unlearning a lifetime of habits

habits and mindfulness

Everyone falls into habits and routines—it’s the nature of being human.

But when you realize your behaviors are inhibiting you from achieving your goals, that doesn’t mean you can vow to change and all will be well.

Every single behavior that you demonstrate—good, bad or ugly—is run by your unconscious mind. So, if you want to change your behavior, you can’t do it by willpower alone.

You must get into your unconscious mind and change it there.


Because research tells us that the unconscious mind has you running on auto pilot 95 percent of the time.

The conscious mind provides 5 percent or less of our cognitive activity. So, even when we think we’re consciously deciding, we’re probably not. We’re operating on pre-existing programs running at the unconscious level.

The good news is that we can reprogram the “software” in our brain, but unlearning a lifetime worth of habits is no simple feat.

Many of our thoughts and attitudes were programmed during childhood, which means they’re out of date. It’s also likely that many of the beliefs that guide your life aren’t your own, having been adopted from your family, culture, or heritage.

Are some of your behaviors not serving you well? If they aren’t, when was the last time you examined your beliefs to see if they’re outdated or support a limited view of what’s possible for you?

3 ways to move from mindless to mindful


If it’s time for behavior change, where do you start in unbinding the ties to the past that aren’t serving you well today?

  • Understand that belief creates experience. You make it happen.

People often think that experience is what leads to beliefs. However, it’s the other way around. Your beliefs shape your destiny. For example, if deep down you believe you’re not good enough to accomplish something, then that belief will create the self-fulfilling prophecy that proves you right.

  • Be the cause for the effects in your life. Own it.

Life is a chain reaction of causes and effects. Everything that happens was caused by what happened before and is the effect for what will happen next. Some people get stuck on the ‘effect’ side of life and bemoan their bad luck. Other people habitually think on the ‘cause’ side of life, which leads to them doing and achieving.

  • Your words say more than you realize. Walk the right talk.

The language we use to share our thoughts and beliefs makes a huge difference. If you change the language you use every day to label people, events, situations and circumstances in your life, your experience and perception of the person, the event, the situation or the circumstance will change.

You have the power


When you recognize that you are creating your life as you go along, you have the power to change.

You have the power:  you can choose to pay attention to different things, to interpret experiences differently, to feel differently, and act differently.

Ready to get started?


Today’s contributor, Carol Talbot, is an author and a keynote speaker who has delivered inspiring messages to corporations and conferences in more than 20 countries. She’s a Certified Master Trainer of Neuro-Linguistic Programming, a Certified Trainer of hypnosis, a Certified Master Trainer of Time Line Therapy, and a Master Firewalk Instructor who fires up teams and groups to walk across burning coals.


Image source:  Pixabay



Ready to hack 3 myths about power that hold you back?

Ready to hack 3 myths about power that hold you back?

power myths

“Why do you keep talking about power?” Asked an exasperated gal pal. “It’s such a nasty topic.”

I agree, power has a bad reputation. BUT, that’s not because power is a bad thing.

Power has a bad reputation because bad people misuse it to benefit themselves.

Egocentric bad boys and queen bees have co-opted power, twisting it into something almost sinister that the rest of us want to stay away from.

Those of us who want to see leadership practiced with kindness and respect have to let go of that belief.

Power is something all good boys and girls need to have.

And use.

…to disrupt the status quo

…to make a positive difference.

…to change things for the better.

To reclaim power and build inclusive workplaces where everyone feels welcome, there are three myths about power we need to put to rest.

3 myths about power to hack


Myth #1:  Let go of the notion that you can be successful without using power.

Whether we realize it or not, every time we take a job we’re given power. It’s called positional power, and we use it every day to make decisions, assign work, or coach an employee on how to do their job better.

“Power is required if one wants to get anything done in any large organization. Unfortunately, power doesn’t just fall into one’s lap: one will have to go after it and learn how to use it.” ~Jeffrey Pfeffer, business theorist and Stanford University professor

Some jobs do have more positional power than others, however, the power in all jobs—the capacity to transform “what is” to “what can be”—is available to us every day. Character-based leaders simply choose to use their power for the greater good, not personal gain.

Myth #2: Toss the notion that you don’t have any power because you aren’t the big boss.

If you have a job, you have power.

Companies expect employees to decide what work is done, make decisions, manage resources, and schedule work. Doing everyone of those things is a source of power. Every person, not just big shots, have job power. (Not something the bad boys and queen bees want us all to know.)

Plus, we all have personal power just waiting for us to put to good use. Position power is what we do; personal power is how we do it.

It’s a state of mind.

It’s you confidently believing in your strength and competence and helping others believe in theirs, too.

Personal power is you, says author and professor Rosabeth Moss Kanter, aiding others “to mobilize resources, inspire creativity, and instill confidence among subordinates.”

Myth #3: Avoiding power because you’re afraid it will corrupt you is an excuse.

There are perks that come with powerful positions. People hang on your every word and want to please you. That can be heady, almost intoxicating stuff. However, the presence of perks doesn’t mean we have to let ourselves be corrupted. We don’t have to believe that we’re above the law or better than those in less powerful positions. We can continue to embrace our “ordinaryness.”

Fearfully shying away from any position or personal power leaves us powerless. Leaves us without the ability to shape outcomes or make a positive difference. It leaves the bad boys and queen bees deciding our fate.

It doesn’t have to be that way.

Let’s take back power and use it wisely and well to create workplaces where everyone has a voice.

Image source before quote:




5 keys to developing personal power

5 keys to developing personal power


5 keysPersonal power is a core leadership competency that everyone needs to develop before they can lead others.

It has to do with being able to lead yourself.

We can help harness and learn to use our personal power by understanding and working on our Emotional Intelligence (EI) skills. (more…)

Want power? Do 3 simple things!

Want power? Do 3 simple things!

power to chooseGot power? Want power? Want to be powerful?

I’m sure hoping the answer was “yes” to all three questions!

Despite some commonly held notions, everyone can have power—lots of it—without being a high-ranking pooh-bah!

Power typically comes in two forms, personal and positional. Each one of us has personal power—”you power.” Most of us have some measure of positional power—”job power”—based on what we do.

Combining the best of “job power” and “you power” is the secret sauce for individual success.

Job power is what we do, and personal power is how we do it.

How each one of us chooses to use our power is up to us:  we can use it for personal gain or for the greater good.

Making good use of our power


Want to use your job and personal power to make a positive difference?

If so, here’s three things for you to do—and be at the top of your power game while helping others do the same. (more…)